On Tuesday we finally got a different treatment plan for my pinch nerve....I have been dealing with numbness/weakness/tingling in my right arm for over three months now and none of the nonsurgical routes are/were helping...so I am now in need of surgery....I am having an anterior cervical discectomy and level one fusion on my neck.....the up side of this is that 95% of people who have the surgery have a full recovery and I am in need of that!
The very next day Wednesday our world came crashing down around us....Andrew was laid off from his position of nearly 6 yrs....and this came out of nowhere....and the timing could not be any worse....even though no matter when it would happen it would still suck....but right now....right before Thanksgiving....and Christmas....it has to be the worst timing EVER!
Yesterday when I woke up and sat down to work I could not even remember what I did last week....it is all a blur....too many events happened last week and having to deal with the fallout of every single one of them left last week as a big giant hole....I never once thought this would happen to us.....I never thought I would have to be the "bread winner" of the family.....and I can't even be called the bread winner not with what I make....Andrew and I have been in difficult times in the past and we always get through them....but this time is so different....we have two children....it's a lot more scary this time around
We have (mostly) accepted that we can not change what happened....we can only deal with what is in front of us and move forward as best we can....this is not the path we wanted or thought we ever would be on....but we are on it now and there is no going back
When I was doing the elliptical yesterday morning a song that I have in my playlist come on and its one that I have always loved...and now it ever has more meaning....
"When it Rains" - Kid Rock
Like a deer in headlights, I stood frozen in my tracks
And the weight of the news, It nearly broke my back
It was late September, and I remember it oh so well
I put a rose in the bible and placed it back on my shelf
Now when it rains, it pours
Wish I didn't know now the things I never knew before
Back then when we were 17
Time was on our side
Holes in our jeans and pocket full of dreams
The future was Friday night
And we would hangout down by the riverbend
Singing our favorite songs
Laughin and drinkin, smokin and smilin
Now those days are gone
Wish I didn't know now the things I never knew before
Like a deer in the headlights, I stood frozen in my tracks
And the weight of you not here nearly from my back
And the tears fell like a monsoon
Underneath the cold fall moon
Somehow God put his hands on your shoulders
Way too, way too soon
Now when it rains, it pours
Wish I didn't know now the things I never knew before
Even through all this I have so much to be thankful for....I am thankful for the support Andrew has received in the past few days....from the small things like coming over and sharing a beer....to the larger ones like giving him leads or recommendations....I am thankful for the surgery scheduler who worked the phones and was able to get me scheduled prior to Dec 1st.....I am thankful for our friends who have sent words and thoughts of encouragement over these past few days....I am thankful for my best friend...who knows exactly what I need when I need it...I am thankful for my family for their support and guidance they have given us....
With that Thank You to everyone who has been here for us these past 6 days....without our support system I don't know where we would be!
Elisa
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDelete